I’m a bit of a scaredy cat really. You’ll not find me bungee jumping or even jumping from the highest diving board. I will do everything possible to avoid taking part in a ‘Trust Fall’. But I think my issue is not heights, my issue is control and trust. I like to be safe and in control. Unfortunately no matter how much I try I do not have the ability nor the power to control the world around me and that leads to panic and fear. As I look back over the past year there have been many ups and downs, all beyond my control. Sometimes it feels like you are on a rollercoaster – on a roller coaster you don’t get a steering wheel nor set of brakes – you just have to go with the ride. Understandably given my control issues I’m not that keen on Roller Coasters either!
In this past year no matter how I have tried to fix broken situations, to make things better, it has been beyond my control and at the end of it all, frustrating. It is funny during the year some things came right in ways that were totally beyond my control that I had worn myself out worrying about for years also. So as I look towards 2012 I do so with excitement at the new journey of parenthood, but also with a bit of trepidation – what will the year hold?
I have decided that my word for this year should be TRUST. I have chosen the word trust because it seems to me to be the opposite of controlling everything myself. Giving over everything to God is a scary business, except I know the One who is in control is totally Trustworthy:
Psalms 20:7-8 Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. 8 They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.
It’s funny – after thinking about Trust over the weekend this morning’s sermons was on the same topic! (I’ll put a link to the sermon once it is uploaded onto the church website).
So this year I choose to TRUST:
T – Seek God for the Truth of who I am and who He is
R – Rest in the knowledge that He is in control so I don’t have to be
U- Understand that God knows what is going on even when I don’t
S – Submit to God’s authority over my life and will
T – realise that I am on Team Jesus so even if my circumstances look bad I’m on the winning side.
Lord, I commit 2012 to you not knowing what lies ahead but with enormous gratitude that You are in control.